Sunday, May 4, 2008

Des is meticulous

Oh, Des. He had a tough day on friday. Not a horrible day but a day where things didn't go as he had hoped and I would have given him a hug at school if he hadn't been shouting "I hate you for coming so early!" at me.

Let me start at the beginning. The kids got this game called Apples to Apples for their birthday. It's basically a game of synonyms and the kids love it. On friday Des asked if he could bring it to school. There was some anxiety over whether or not his friends would want to play with him and he was also going to need a staff member or somebody else who could read to play because the whole game is a bunch of playing cards with words on them. You need to be able to read. Des has been complaining that there is nothing fun to do at school and that is why he stays in the computer room all the time so I was happy that he was taking some initiative in finding a new activity. I wasn't sure how it would work out because Des is not shy so much as he is private. He is selective with his affection and he doesn't like asking for help so I was surprised that he wanted to bring the game to school.

On fridays the kids go to gymnastics after school so I have to pick them up early. We have an argument about it every week. This past friday was no exception, just louder and angrier than usual. Des had a cleaning job, he had to clean all the glass doors. I guess it took him about 2 1/2 hours and I showed up just as he finished. He was pissed.

I stopped in the office for a minute to chitchat and a staff member said "Des is a very good cleaner. Very meticulous." Now, I had just been berated by Des for showing up at the time that I had told him I would be arriving and I also know that Des can move so slowly at times that it seems to violate laws of the physical world so I said, flippantly, "Well, that's one word for it." as soon as the words were out of my mouth I regretted them. I don't want to be the kind of mom that just looks for the worst in her kids. And I know that I'm not but still. I need to remember to stay positive, no matter how aggravated I might be.

He was still yelling at me as we got in the car so I tried to change the subject by asking "hey, did you play your game?" He gave me this evil look and screamed, no exaggeration, screamed at me "I'm too shy!!!" I felt so bad for him. It's terrible to see your child hurting. He wouldn't let me hug him though. When we were on the road I mentioned that the staff member had said that he was meticulous and he said"Well what's that supposed to mean?" I said "It means that you were very thorough and paid attention to what you were doing and did a good job." "Yeah and that's why it took me forever! Forever!! And I had no time to play!" So I said "Yeah, but you must have cleaned the shit out of those doors, Des." That finally got a smile. He loves it when I curse.

I know the above mentioned staff member reads my blog from time to time so this is a half assed thank you note for reminding me to accentuate the positive. :)

2 comments:

Jen in FL said...

I'm so glad the kids like the game. :-)

Also, I adore this post.

cindy said...

I want to play apples to apples!
Jess you sure do know how to tell a good story, and in your defense you are one of the most positive people i know. Yes, I do read your blog and thanks for the thank you ,even if you think it was half as#@.