Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Working through the tough stuff

I don't know exactly what's going on but I get the sense that it isn't just my kids who have hit a wall but it feels like the whole school has. Right now there is a budget shortfall so they asked families to donate some extra money per kid. Less than half did. I understand that things are tight for people, I'm not unsympathetic, but nothing? Not even $20 to just help out a little bit?

I feel like the staff is overworked and can't be the kind of models that they want to be. One of the founding staff members is leaving at the end of this year and that makes me feel very nervous.

I'm hitting my own wall as a parent because I feel like I'm seeing and hearing about a whole lot of nothing. Des doesn't talk about anything but the computer. The few times that I have picked them up they are almost always on the computer. Amelia talked about more plans and ideas last year and this year, nothing. I know she was spending a lot of time in the art room for a while but that kind of petered out.

Hmm, let me take a step back and think about this. For a while she was into the art room, bringing home all sorts of projects. She is also reading. Not sitting down and reading a book but she tells me what things say so I know she's getting there. She can sort of add and subtract. She definitely gets snottier than she used to. She peppers her speech with the word "like" and occasionally adopts a valley girl cadence. She still shows amazing patience with her brother and sister but she is not as helpful as she used to be. She doesn't get written up very often. She still pretty much goes to school meeting only if she has a motion. She's very interested in the bookstore. Thinks I should buy it. :) I know some of these things are developmental and I'm not blaming the school for her growing up. What concerns me is the decrease in enthusiasm and ideas.

Des often complains of boredom and talks incessantly about the computer. Likes math. Is not quite along with the reading but working on it. Has become even more resistant to instruction in any way, shape, or form. If Des isn't convinvced that something is going to be fun beforehand or that he's going to be perfect at something from the very first try, he doesn't want to do it. He had a huge meltdown this weekend because Amelia went on this day long hike in the woods and he didn't. He didn't want to go because it was a drop off and when we got there he said it didn't look fun enough. fine. Turns out that it wasn't just a hike but there was a story involved and they found a sword and got to touch it. He went ballistic. It sucks that he has to learn this way that if you don't try things you often end up missing out on fun but there you go.

While Amelia was on this hike we went to the playground at an elementary school. Cady had to go to the bathroom so I took her inside the school and it turned out there was a fencing tournament. Cady, Finn, Des and I watched it and found out that there's a fencing club that meets at the school on tuesday nights. Des has been interested in swords and stuff like that for a while so last night I proposed going to a meeting. He was very suspicious.
"Is it a class?"
"No, it's a club."
"Well, do I have to do it?"
"No."
"I don't think I'm big enough to hold a sword with one hand."
"Would you be willing to try?"
"Yes. do parents stay?"
"Sure."
"Are they just going to teach me stuff. Is it a class?"
"No, it's a club and peeople might tell you things if they think it's helpful but it's not a class. If they see you holding the sword and your arm hurts they might say 'try holding it this way'."
"OK. do I have to go every week? What if I don't like it?"
"Des, I'm not going to answer that yet because you tend to like things but then say you hate them and never want to go again but then you go back and you do like it. So I'm not going to make any promises."
"OK. but what if I don't want to be in the club anymore?"
"Well, we haven't actually joined it yet so let's not worry about quitting. Why don't we just try going and see what it's like."

I have a conversation like this with Des about any new activity. Even the ones that are his idea.

1 comment:

Jen in FL said...

I wonder if it has anything to do with the long winter we have just endured. We certainly have had a similar malaise down here. I'm hoping warmer weather and sunnier skies will perk everyone back up.