Asking questions is a good way to find things out

So I decided to ask the staff about the attendance policy. I really only wanted three people's opinion on it but I felt that everyone should be given a chance to answer if they wanted. It seemed to be more democratic that way. I sent an email privately rather than the Assembly list because I was afraid my questions would be misunderstood and there is always someone who goes off on a tangent and the original point gets loss in the ensuing evolution of the conversation. I sent an email even though I prefer to have these conversations face to face although email does offer some nice advantages. I can be more thoughtful and measured in my responses in an email or a letter, although I'm not always, and I think sometimes it's easier to say things that you might not face to face. On the other hand, without the visual cues of body language it is so easy to misinterpret tone. I reread my original email and while I was trying to be succinct I think, because I tend to be jokey and cheerful by nature in person, it could be read as hostile or challenging but I was trying to keep it all business.

Why did I even feel the need to do this? Like any human being I brought my own bagage and assumptions when I read the policy and I was feeling really negative about it. I'm invested in this school. I'm not a founder or a staff member but this is where my kids will spend a large part of their childhood. I simply will not have them in an environment that generates more negative feelings for me than positive ones. I used to work in a nursing home and when I would tell people what I did they would say "Oh my mother was in a nursing home. It was horrible. It was the worst place in the world." And I would think, "Then why did you leave her there?" That's how I feel about schools. No place is perfect but when I have more bad things to say than good, they're out of there.

So I felt if I understood it better I would be more accepting of it and I was right. The reason for mandatory attendance is that the school is only as "vibrant as it's students". If there aren't enough people there it's like a poorly attended party-everyone milling around wondering where everyone else is. I also came to realize that there is a difference between policy and procedure. Policy is what you want done. Procedure is how you do it. As a parent I really only need to know the policy and maybe the reasons behind it, reading the endless list of details and stuff made it feel burdensome. I'm glad I was able to sort that out too.

Here is a funny thing about human communication. I first noticed it in the second Matrix movie. Too often we answer questions that nobody asked or present something that will generate all sorts of questions and then never answer them.